


Godfathers 2.0

by avid_Alice



Series: Ineffable Misadventure [2]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Baby Sitter Warlock, Baby sitter the Them, F/M, Godfather Aziraphale, Godfather Crowley, M/M, Multi, pregnant beelzebub
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-15
Updated: 2019-09-18
Packaged: 2020-10-18 23:01:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20647121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/avid_Alice/pseuds/avid_Alice
Summary: Aziraphale and Crowley had seen so many things in the last 6000 years on Earth. Seeing the Archangel Gabriel with an obviously pregnant Prince of hell–that of the latter had a serious illness on the midsection is not something they had expected in a million years. Now, everyone is on a roller coaster ride of a demon pregnancy and babysitting the baby.





	1. Dumplings

The days had been normal since the day Aziraphale and Crowley received notes from their respective offices. Apparently, from all the observations they sent and others what Crowley mentioned about heaven and hell gong against humanity may just be true. 

Personally, Crowley didn't want his angel to be in contact with heaven anymore, especially the angels who were present during his trial, but he is an angel after all. Forgiving is his nature. So, there they are, in the middle of Saturday–date day, which made Crowley more annoyed than he should have been, in the bookshop with Gabriel and a pregnant Beelzebub. How that happened is yet to be discussed. 

"Um, can you run that by me again." Aziraphale, still confused, how the Heaven's Herald and Prince of Hell had come to procreate. 

"Angry sex. Lots and lots of angry sex." Beelzebub says, getting irritated for well, no reason at all. Hormones and such. "How the heavens did you averted the war if you're this stupid?!" 

Crowley was about to say something when Gabriel had beaten him into it. "Hey, we talked about this. We're asking—" He stopped, giving the encouraging look to Beelzebub. 

The Lord of the Flies, still looking grumpy answers through gritted teeth, "help." 

"Therefore we should be–" Gabriel continues and Aziraphale can't seem to get mad at the prince of hell, even Crowley is looking amused at the two. 

"I am the prince of hell! I shouldn't be suffering this humiliation!" Beelzebub grumbles, now refusing to look at any of the other three occupants of the room. 

"I think we've established that a long time ago, Lord Beelzebub." Crowley answers and sits beside Aziraphale on the couch across the expecting parents. "Isn't that why you two are here? What I still don't get is why you thought it's a good idea to ask help from us."

"You raised the son of the American ambassador." The prince of hell answers, then tried to reach out for the wine Crowley got for himself. 

Said demon beat them into it with a stern look. "Look here, I don't know how this works but as far as we know, alcohol is a big no for pregnant people."

"That's–" 

"Thank you for letting us know." Gabriel says, beating any argument Beelzebub might have had. 

The discussion of Beelzebub's pregnancy did not go as smooth as Gabriel thought it would have. It may have something to do with the fact that they both tried to kill the other two. Crowley wanted to say no, really. Then again, seeing the interaction between Gabriel and Beelzebub made him curious to his bones. Given that there are more differences between the two, it does wonder to his mind and silently asks The Almighty if  _ this _ is another part of the ineffable plan. Well, maybe it is maybe it is not. That is just for The Almighty to know. 

“Right. So, here’s the apartment.” Crowley says as he invites the pair into his apartment. Just because he’s doing so, doesn’t make him a willing participant of what Aziraphale calls, _**Project**_ ** _ Make the Baby Not Like His/Her Parents._ ** One moment they were discussing where should Beelzebub stay during pregnancy, as they’re not sure how long it will be and she’s already showing, and the next Aziraphale is whispering promises if he lends them his apartment and stays with him in the meantime. “This is the, I don’t know really. I just sulk here most of the time.”

“I hope you don’t mind if we make some changes in the time being.” Gabriel asks as politely as he can.

Beelzebub is admiring the comfort of Crowley’s chair as the Archangel looks around the room, making a decision about how he would decorate the place. “Of course he doesn’t” They say, trying to slouch and put their feet on the table but failing due to the bulging of their stomach. “That’s if he wanna get laid tonight, of course.” Beelzebub smirks at him and Crowley may or may not have been planning to give the pregnant demon a false information about pregnancy for his own amusement. “ I like this chair. Keep this, everything can go.”

Gabriel looks at the owner for confirmation and upon receiving a nod, Gabriel filled the room with pastel colored bedroom furniture. Both demons grunts at the sight and with one eye contact, both snapped their fingers and it all changed as to their black on black standard.

“This is more like it.” Beelzebub hums in approval and moves from the chair to the bed.

“It’s too dark.” Gabriel protests, but still moves to sit by the prince’s feet to massage them. They’ve been asking for that for a lot these days. 

“And I just wanted to eat dumplings but now I’m carrying your spawn.” Beelzebub retaliates. All the while Crowley is in his plant room, talking to his plants some other people will be taking care of them for a while.

Once he went back to the turned bedroom, Beelzebub had fallen asleep and Gabriel is flipping through the book Aziraphale had given him about pregnancy. How his angel had come to the possession of such is still a mystery he would have to find out later. Crowley observes the archangel as some things had probably confused him given that the only pregnancy related thing he had with someone was when he delivered the message of the Holy Spirit to Mary. 

“Any questions?” Crowley asks with an amused grin.

“Lower your voice. They’re a light sleeper.” Gabriel answers, eyes still on the book. “And yes I have questions. Tons of them.”

“Let’s hear some of them then, wank wings.”

Gabriel looked at him as if he’s scrutinizing the demon inside out. They only had minimal interaction, one of which is when he was as Aziraphale and tried to kill him. This is something new. As a demon, they can easily detect vulnerability in all creatures, makes their jobs easier. Right now, Crowley is overwhelmed by the vulnerability he is feeling from the archangel. Never had he experienced such in an interaction and it alarms him. So much that he shifts uncomfortably where he stands under the weak aura of Gabriel.

With a deep breath, Gabriel asks, not Crowley in particular in all honesty. “How could this possibly happen?”

“I thought we already established that?” Crowley spoke again, softer this time. “Lots of angry sex. Next question, more substantial this time.”

“Have you had sex with Aziraphale?” Gabriel asks, vulnerability level lowering and mischief getting high.

“We’ve been  _fraternizing_ for 6000 years, what do you think?”

“Then how come he or you never got pregnant?” Gabriel asks confusedly.

“Just because we did doesn’t mean we’ve been doing it for a long time.” Crowley answers, a laugh threatening to bubble out. “Speaking of, I need to run by Will’s to get a cake. Any problem, that’s the phone. Just press one it goes directly to Aziraphale’s bookshop, two for his cellphone. Ciao”

Once left alone Gabriel turns to the sleeping prince on the bed looking at the bump and absent-mindedly reached out to it. A surge of protectiveness going through him. Something stronger than what he felt during the first war. For the first time in a long time, Gabriel found another purpose. Something that wasn’t given to him on a silver platter but of his own choice. It scares himーfree will, yet he knows he is willing to gamble even his standing as an archangel if it means protecting Beelzebub and their unborn child.


	2. Appearances and All

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabriel and Beelzebub goes shopping.

There are many things the Prince of Hell had expected after Armageddon. One is that they’ll win and finally get to rule over the, what Dagon had kindly put,  _ insufferable wankers _ for eternity. Another, a lot less appealing but could have been a reality is that they will lose and would face either an extinction or the upstairs would try to bring them back again. 

On the bright day of Sunday, just three days after the visit to Aziraphale and Crowley said pair showed up with a cake and chocolate milkshakes for the bureaucrats. 

“You didn’t have to bring such matter.” Gabriel says, opening the door of the flat.

“It’s not for you wank wings.” Crowley answers and walks past him, followed by Aziraphale who is carrying the cake. “Lord Beelzebub!” Crowley calls.

“Did you bring it?” Beelzebub asks immediately and face lighting up as their eyes landed on the milkshake. “Gimme!”

“Hello.” Aziraphale greets the pregnant demon politely. “I hope you have an appetite. I brought cake.” The angel sets the cake down on the coffee table in the room, miracling the box away.l

“What flavor is that?” Beelzebub asks, still carrying the chocolate milkshake then moves to sit on the sofa facing the table.

“I recall your fondness of the caramel cake with marshmallow fluff so we bought one,” Crowley answered and summons a cake cutter and two platters. “Angel also likes it apparently.” The demon observes the left hand of his previous employer which sports an unusual jewelry. “Lord Beelzebub are you wearing a ring?”

Beelzebub looks at Crowley emotionless, then at their ring finger on their left hand. “Oh yeah. Apparently, I’m married to an asshole.” Beelzebub answers and accepts the cake from Aziraphale. 

“Hey, I’m standing right here!” Gabriel protested, still standing by the door.

“And you’re doing it beautifully.” Crowley smirks at him and sits down next to Aziraphale who is telling Beelzebub the other flavors from Will’s Pastry House. 

The archangel crosses his arm which, to Beelzebub’s continuous amusement is too obvious in the almost skin tight shirt he chose as an alternative to his usual three to five pieces suits. When they went shopping just two days ago after settling in, there were sets of surprises neither the Prince of Hell or the Archangel Gabriel had expected in all the millenia they spent knowing each other. 

One of which are the human names Gabriel decided for them without any consultation. The misadventure started with a nak visit as to establish a more human appearances so to speak.

“Nice to meet you, two. I’m Samantha, how may I be of service?” The bank clerk greets the pair. 

“Hi, my wife and I are planning to open a joint account.” Beelzebub, never in her existence would have thought that the Archangel Gabriel would call them anything that would put them on equal footing. 

“Yes of course, Mr. and Mrs.─”

“Smith.” Gabriel says without missing a beat, accompanied by his usual dashing smile. “Gabriel and Bel─Belle,” He thought and looks at Beelzebub who only raised an eyebrow at him. “Gabriel and Belle Smith.”

Throughout the experience of filing their joint bank account much like Aziraphale and Crowley did after they started living together after the failed end of the world, Beelzebub is amused to know that one, Gabriel have filed and manipulated record of their  _ wedding _ prior to the appointment. Two, there are many options when it comes to handling finances. Something the prince finds a waste of time given that the human life is so short. Three, Gabriel is illiterate. Heaven’s herald cannot read a single human word which Beelzebub finds both funny and irritating. Maybe a little bit precious but no one would dare say it, upon seeing the knitted eyebrows of the angel and later on the huff of resignation of Gabriel followed by forms being handed to Beelzebub can recall now and still laugh about. 

They went around the shopping center going from one shop to another. First, of course as usual for this pair is the usual banter, during this time though Gabriel is compromising, means he’s doing whatever Beelzebub wants. After their banter, they went to the maternity clothes section because apparently it’s frowned upon to wear either a suit or a  _ skimpy _ dress as per Crowley’s comment the last time Beelzebub tried to wear women's clothing to ask if they can blend in. Well, if not for Aziraphale the demon might have said something more crude.

Now, there is a sales lady assisting them of the maternity clothes should Beelzebub wear and it actually makes the prince of hell physically cringe. They’re all either white, floral, or light colored. Gabriel is enjoying seeing them though, going all shopaholic mode as the human lady keeps on showing  _ progress appropriate dresses _ that are certain to give comfort for his  _ wife _ as their baby grows within her _ .  _

Beelzebub had lost interest upon noticing that Gabriel had every human in the department store wrapped around his not so much heavenly fingers. Instead, they started straying more on the baby section and got amused at the things humans had made to aid the growth of their offspring.

“Hi, miss. Can I assist you on something?” A young man approached them.

“Yes.” Beelzebub answers, having that same air of royalty around them which made the salesman a little more attentive. “I’d like to know more about these.” They gestured in the general direction of the displayed cribs. 

While the salesman is explaining everything to Beelzebubㄧ pros and cons of each design, Gabriel spotted them and admires the focused expression the prince of hell has. Out of the two bureaucrats, Beelzebub is always the one keen on details. Always analytical and always a seven steps ahead of anyone else. It scares most of the angels and all of hell. You can do one move of your finger and they would know your thoughts and your next action, this is also the same reason why, even for the longest time that Beelzebub had been inactive on the field, all of hell, Lucifer included still respects them without a doubt. 

Still smiling, Gabriel makes his way to the Lord of the Flies and just puts an arm around them, hands resting on the side of their bump. The salesman smiled at the angel as an acknowledgement and proceeded on explaining the benefit of having the suspending nets rather than buying a separate changing table.

After two more products and a set of brochures to talk it over with her  _ husband _ , Beelzebub says their farewell to the salesman. It was a thorough walk through the different product. They are thinking of recruiting the human as a trainer in hell to make the new demons more efficient in selling points. This is after all, a new era. 

“Don’t you think we ought to buy a ring?” Beelzebub asks as they walk out of the shop called Under Armor for Gabriel’s everyday wear.

“I suppose we should.” The angel hums. “I mean, appearances and all.”

In the end, they settled on a white gold ring with black diamond and an amethyst as to have a representation of both of them, and if Gabriel spends long time admiring Beelzebub’s ring finger now more than ever, then no one has to know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know what usual things pregnant people crave. Can anyone suggest?

**Author's Note:**

> I still haven't thought of a baby's name by the way. Any suggestion, just drop it in. Also, I apologize as early as now for all the typos. I'm lazy to proofread soooo.


End file.
